Tuesday, August 24, 2004

Write an email to yourself, in the future.

Cool and spooky. I bet I would write it and then forget so in a year (or two) when I got it, I would be really freaked out. Which would be awesome.

I honestly don't know what to say to myself. So, I think I will save the idea for later.

It's still cool though...


Monday, August 23, 2004

Mirror, Mirror, on the wall

Something about my mirror at home is messing with my life.

When I walk into the bathroom in the morning, it goes like this:

Mirror: Hello! You look sleepy! But pretty! You're pretty! I like your hair! Even when you have bed head, it's still very nice. NICE!
Me: Thanks. I will wet it and then style it too.
Mirror: That will be lovely! And beautiful! I like when you style your hair STRAIGHT! Do it, straight!
Me: Okay, I will.
Mirror: Great!

15 minutes later, I have dried my hair and I have a curly freakout on the side, but otherwise, I am on my way.

Mirror: Put on some concelear! You have a PIMPLE!
Me: I know. I see it.
Mirror: Okay. It's right THERE! By your NOSE!
Me: I know.
Mirror: ....
Me: Okay?
Mirror: LOVELY! I never would know you ever had a pimple! Wear the Clinque lipstick! The brown one!
Me: Okay. Calm down.
Mirror: Oh-KAY!

Finally, I decide I am done and take one last look.

Mirror: You look BEAOOOOTIFUL. It will be a great day! See you later! Bye!
Me: Bye. Thanks.
Mirror: Bye! Have a great day! Be beautiful!
Me: Okay. Bye.
Mirror: Byeeee!
Me: Bye. Stay here. I'll see you later. Don't follow me.
Mirror: Bye, Beautiful!!

Then I get my iced coffee and I get on the train. I look in the train window and I hear
Subway Window: What are you wearing?
Me: Um, just this shirt. It's from the Gap.
Subway: Why did you wear that shit...I mean SHIRT?
Me: I don't know. I thought it was okay.
Subway: Er. Alrighty. Whatever you say.
Me: Well....?
Subway: I've seen you look better. [pause] And what is happening with your hair?

At work the bathroom mirror must also get in on the action:

Work Mirror: Hi.
Me: Hi?
WM: That lipstick is no good in here.
Me: Eh...
WM: Did you listen to that other mirror again? She's such a suckup.
Me: Well, in that lighting...
WM: It's not the lighting.
Me: Okay.... I'm going to go in the stall now.
WM: Alright. [judgemental pause] Change your shirt while you are in there.

When I get home it is always the same

Mirror: You look tired!
Me: Yep.
Mirror: Wash your face and you'll feel! Better!
Me: ...
Mirror: Are you OKAY!?!
Me: Just some people told me they didn't like my shirt.
Me: ... and my lipstick
Mirror: OH NO.
Me: I know.
Mirror: But you are BEAUTIFUL!
Me: You keep saying that.
Mirror: Really! Don't beat yourself up!
Me: Um. Thanks. I guess.
Mirror: Yay!
Me: Okay. I'll see you later.
Mirror: Not if I see you first!
Me: Yeah,...good one. Bye.
Mirror: Byeeeeeeee!

because I said so